Guilty Love

  • Posted on February 22, 2021 at 1:38 pm

by Xarth

{ This story was originally posted at Literotica in February 2012 }

Things should have changed after being away from home for the better part of a year, that’s what I thought anyway. My first year at university had been different certainly, but not in the sort of grand life-changing way I had hoped for. Returning home at the end of the school year I found everything pretty much the same. I may as well not have bothered.

As sisters, and only about a year and a half apart, I grew up sharing a room with Lindsay. That hadn’t changed either and even now as I lay in my bed staring at the ceiling I could hear her soft breathing from across the room. I turned my head to look at her but couldn’t make out much more than an undefined mound where her blanket covered her. To think one of the biggest problems in my life was sleeping in the same room as me.

It sounded terrible when I thought of it that way. It wasn’t like Lindsay had done anything to deserve being labeled as a problem, even just in my mind. She was as good a sister as I could have asked for and I wouldn’t have traded her for anything. I just wished I could fix whatever was wrong with me.

Sighing heavily, and knowing I was better off staying put, I swung my feet off the side of my bed and stood up. I had taken to sleeping naked while I was away, but in acknowledgment of my return home I settled for stripping down to my underwear. Clad in my bra and panties, I crossed the room to stand beside my little sister’s sleeping form.

Only her head was visible sticking out from under the blanket that covered the rest of her body. Now that I was closer I could make out the features on her face, or at least half of her face. In the months I’d been at university she had turned eighteen and, if anything, she looked even more adorable than when I left.

I didn’t know when my bizarre and frustrating obsession had started but it must have been related to us sleeping in the same room. The thing was that as cute as Lindsay could be during the day, the effect was somehow even stronger when she slept. The sheer look of tranquility and contentment that she held was enough to render me helpless.

“Perfect,” I whispered under my breath.

That was the only word I’d come up that came close to describing how she looked to me. Watching her now I saw that same face, the one that had driven me crazy. A little older perhaps but no less perfect than before.

I’d hoped that some distance between us would help, that not seeing her for so many months would make me realize that I didn’t really feel anything more than a love for my little sister. Unfortunately, the feelings were stronger now, and many of them were definitely unsisterly.

I reached down to grasp the top of Lindsay’s blanket and tugged it gently away from her shoulder before stopping myself. I’d always managed to keep from actually doing anything more than looking before and that’s how it needed to stay. She didn’t need to know how messed up I was, she didn’t deserve to have to deal with my issues. They were for me alone.

For several long moments, I stood there, blanket still in hand. Slowly I pulled it farther down her body until I reached her waist. I was losing the battle, or maybe winning. Always hard to keep score on internal struggles. I was still just looking, I told myself, I was just getting the blanket out of the way. It wasn’t really anything I hadn’t seen before.

Soon Lindsay’s blanket was piled up at the base of the mattress and her entire beautiful form lay before me. She was lying mostly on her stomach with her head turned toward me. She had on a t-shirt and pajama pants as usual, the same I always used to wear to bed too. I noticed that her shirt had pulled up a little as she slept, exposing maybe an inch or two of skin on her back.

It was weird how interesting skin could be at times. It was constantly visible on other people; their hands or arms or faces, yet sometimes it was different. In the right places or on the right people it turned from an everyday sight to something more fascinating than the greatest work of art. The small patch on my sister’s back wasn’t quite that amazing, but it was still enough to draw my attention.

My hand went to the gap between her shirt and pants without even bothering to ask permission from my brain. I let my palm lay flat on her back for a moment before jerking it away. Now I was going too far, crossing a line I had always managed to avoid in the past. And yet, it felt so good.

Feeling guilty even before I touched her again I returned my hand to Lindsay’s back, pushing the hem of her shirt up a little as I spread my fingers out. I slowly ran my hand up her spine to about the midpoint between her waist and neck before sliding it back to its starting position. Having pulled her shirt up some I wondered just how far I could get away with. It couldn’t come off, not without actually moving her, and I didn’t think she’d sleep through that.

Taking hold of the bottom of my sister’s shirt on either side of her body I carefully tugged it upward. It was caught between her stomach and the mattress where she lay on it but I still managed to get it up to almost the level of her breasts.

I paused as I considered the possibilities, then slipped my fingers under the bunched-up edge of Lindsay’s shirt. Only the side of her breast was available to me without rolling her over and it really wasn’t enough to get much of a feel, but it was more the idea of what I was doing anyway. It was so wrong in so many ways and so very, very exhilarating.

My heart was pounding and my hesitation was disappearing as my hormones took over. I’d still feel bad in the morning and I’d wish I hadn’t done any of this, but I couldn’t stop.

I turned my attention downward to the yet untouched pyjama pants that covered my little sister’s lower half. They were loose, meant for comfort, and I decided I could probably get away with a similar process as I’d done to her shirt. Her legs were lying apart slightly, spreading wide enough that I wouldn’t be able to get her waistband past her knees without pushing them together. That was okay though, I could still get it down far enough for my purposes.

I ended up only pulling Lindsay’s bottoms down to just below her butt where I stopped and just stared. I’d seen her in her underwear or swimsuit plenty of times, and I had a fair idea what she looked like anyway, but still. Like every part of her body, it seemed to fit, not too big or too small but just perfectly curved. Why did my sister have to be so goddamn amazing?

My level of arousal was getting too high and, despite knowing I should retreat to my bed first, I gave in and slipped a hand into my panties. My pussy was so wet already I could feel the moisture that had soaked into the front of panties against my knuckles. For a few minutes, I simply played with myself, trying to satisfy my urges enough to regain some control. My fingers sank easily into my sodden pussy and I wished momentarily for my vibrator but couldn’t force myself to move from where I was to get it.

Finally, I wrenched my hand away and took a couple of deep breaths trying to calm down. If all I wanted to do was masturbate I could do that from the relative safety of my bed. I should get my sister’s clothes straightened out and return to my side of the room.

Although…

I couldn’t resist. Lindsay’s bare butt was right there, begging to be touched. As far as I had gone already, I might as well go a little further.

With a slight tremble, I lowered my hand onto her perfectly smooth ass and almost immediately my instincts took over again. I couldn’t keep my already pussy-lubricated fingers from diving back in, this time with the addition of my palm mashing against my clit.

I was rubbing my sister’s butt dangerously hard and tried to reign myself in from giving her a full-on massage. That she still slept was probably using up my quota of luck for the year. Nevertheless, the sensation of actually feeling her this way was overriding most of my ability to form coherent thoughts. All I cared about was coming, and coming soon.

My wrist was going to hate me in the morning, but then I’d hate myself in the morning too so nothing special there. Somehow I continued to move my arm faster, plunge my fingers deeper and harder inside me until finally, that familiar feeling started building deep within me. I don’t think I’d ever been so glad to achieve orgasm in my life, and certainly, it had never felt so amazing.

Somehow I avoided making more than a small whimpering noise while I came. I wasn’t usually a screamer anyway but I certainly could have been this time.

I pulled my hand out of my panties finally, finding it as wet as I expected. Lacking anything at hand to wipe my fingers off with I resorted to sucking them clean as best I could. I really didn’t mind the taste but it wasn’t anything special enough that I went out of my way to lick myself off that way most of the time.

As soon as I finished with my hand I started on getting Lindsay re-clothed. Her shirt was easy enough but her bottoms took a little more effort to pull back, particularly with my sense of caution coming back. Lastly, I pulled her blanket back up and made sure she was tucked in snugly as memories came back to me of taking care of her like this in more innocent times. Back when I was the sister Lindsay deserved.

I sighed and stood up, not yet taking my eyes off of my sister. There were no easy options, no way to make sure she was happy. If she found out my secret, if I left, even if I tried to talk to her, it could all go so badly. I was stuck with simply trying to pretend things were normal and hope that I could control myself better in the future. I’d been doing so well until tonight.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered even though I knew she couldn’t hear me.

Since my panties were pretty much soaked and would become increasingly uncomfortable I slid them off before collapsing on my bed. I thought I would be up a while thinking and worrying but instead, I felt sleep claiming me almost as soon as I got settled in. That orgasm took more out of me than I thought.

***

“Andrea! Hey c’mon, time to get up!”

I grumbled and only cracked open one eye to see who was waking me up so early in the morning. Or maybe not so early, the sun had already brightened the room and I could hear the background noises of activity downstairs. It must have just felt earlier than it was due to my lack of sleep last night.

Lindsay was standing beside my bed, almost bouncing in frustration as I refused to move. After a few seconds, she jumped on my bed and started shaking my shoulder vigorously.

“What?” I croaked.

“Come on, Mom’s making pancakes and bacon and she says I can’t have any until I get you up,” Lindsay said.

As sleepy as I still was, I knew better than to stand between my sister and the prospect of her favorite breakfast.

“All right, all right,” I said. “I need to get dressed first, though.”

Maybe Lindsay had forgotten my choice of sleepwear these days, maybe it was something else. Either way, she only clued in what I meant when I sat up and let my blanket fall away from my chest to reveal my bra. In one swift motion, she was off my bed and digging through my shirt drawer.

“I forgot you don’t wear much to bed these days,” she said. “How about just a long shirt? You still have some, right?”

“There should be a blue one there that would do. On the left-hand side, I think.”

She really had no idea what happened last night, for her it was business as usual. A small pang of guilt hit me as I watched her from my bed and remembered what she looked like with her pajama pants pulled halfway down her legs. It wasn’t nearly as bad as I expected though, maybe because I wasn’t really focused yet.

Lindsay soon held her hand up in triumph and tossed me the balled-up shirt. It was one of the few night-shirts I still possessed since I didn’t wear them to bed anymore, but they still came in handy every now and then. I pulled it on while still sitting down and let the hem fall down past my waist when I stood up, thus hiding just how naked my lower half was.

With me following close behind my sister made her way happily down to the breakfast table. She was acting so normal, and that was a really good sign as far as I was concerned. It meant I hadn’t ruined anything yet.

I just had to make sure it stayed that way.

***

For a few days I actually managed to avoid any further ill-advised actions. The images of Lindsay’s body burned into my brain were enough to keep me reasonably happy and to keep my thoughts off of any more exploration. I was however masturbating more than usual, particularly throughout the daytime, in an attempt to keep my hormones in check. This tended to leave me less horny at night when I was most likely to slip up.

I didn’t completely stop getting myself off while in bed or anything. It was just such a convenient time, already lying down and relaxed as I was. I usually waited until I was sure Lindsay was asleep of course, not that she would necessarily mind if she knew what I was doing. The thing was that even if she was cool with knowing I masturbated, it could still lead to awkward areas of discussion between us that I would rather avoid. Safer just not to be caught.

Unfortunately, one night it just wasn’t working for me. It happened sometimes that I just couldn’t reach orgasm and, while not a huge problem in some ways, it did tend to leave me sexually frustrated. That was not really a state I wanted to be in given my current circumstances.

I’d tried various techniques from gently finger-fucking my pussy to frantically rubbing my clit until my wrist got tired. I even stumbled out of bed long enough to grab my vibrator which usually did the trick. All I got for my efforts was sore and increasingly annoyed.

The worst part was I knew exactly what I could do to get the stimulation I needed. My sister was snoring softly in her bed and definitely asleep enough for my purposes by now. It would kind of defeat the whole point of what I’d been doing, it seemed that my plan may in fact have backfired on me. I’d unintentionally worked myself up instead of calming down and I was left without many options. When I thought about it I really only had two choices; give in and take advantage of my sister again or restrain myself and suffer through a long and possibly sleepless night.

Maybe if I could just distract myself with something I would drift off. I could probably go down into the living room and put the TV on quiet enough that I wouldn’t wake anyone. It might mean falling asleep on the couch but that wasn’t really a bad trade-off compared to not sleeping at all.

I didn’t even make it off my bed before pausing, barely having thrown off my covers and swung my feet onto the floor. TV wasn’t what I wanted. What I wanted was lying directly across from me.

Almost in a trance I stood and walked over to Lindsay’s bed. I’d gotten away with it once, I probably could again. Even as I made the arguments in my head I knew I was in trouble. I was trying to rationalize and I wasn’t resisting very well either. Is this how it was going to be, easier every time until something finally went wrong?

Lindsay actually had a corner of her blanket tucked under her arm which took a little bit of prying loose but I soon had it piled up at her feet. I wondered if she had taken after me and started sleeping in her underwear whether that would have made things easier or harder on me. Idle musings weren’t getting me anywhere though, and as long as I was going to go through with this again I should probably be as quick as possible.

With my recently gained experience, I found it much easier getting my sister’s pajama pants partway down her legs than last time. Partly that was because I wasn’t quite as worried about her waking up since I was a little more familiar with her tolerances. If she had been on her back I might have gone for her shirt too, but it didn’t seem worth the effort with her lying on her stomach again.

As with last time the sight of my sister’s naked ass was enough to nearly hypnotize me. This was what I needed. I moved my hands simultaneously; one to my pussy and the other to Lindsay’s butt, stroking both of them eagerly. It was kind of like a sexy coordination test.

With all the futility of my efforts so far I was glad to feel the increased arousal provided by my unwitting sister and to sense that it was working. I wasn’t yet near orgasm but it would come, somehow I knew it would.

It wasn’t long before my exploring fingers tracing Lindsay’s skin led me to notice a change in her position. She was mostly lying the same she had been last time but with subtle differences. Notably I discovered that I had better access as I slid my hand farther down between her legs. I didn’t go too far at first but I started to wonder if I could actually get to her pussy.

I shouldn’t of course, I should just be happy with what I had. Already I had gone much too far and pushing more was just…

Actually, there really wasn’t any reason I could think of why it would be any worse. I was already completely fucked, figuratively speaking, if I got caught. How exactly were the consequences going to get any worse?

Slowly and very carefully I slid my hand between Lindsay’s legs. It took me a second or two to actually realize when I was touching her pussy since it seemed to be completely smooth. I kept my pussy shaved pretty much constantly just because I liked the feel when I was playing with myself, but I never even considered that my sister might do the same.

I ended up not being able to get entirely underneath her, but far enough at least that I could almost cup her pussy in my palm. It was such a high touching her where I was, more so even than her ass had provided. My long awaited orgasm was fast approaching and happily concentrated on achieving it as fast as I possibly could.

If I had been a little calmer I might have seen the warning signs of my sister waking up.

“Andrea?”

I heard my name spoken in a confused voice and for half a second I was just as confused where it had come from. Then I understood and I experienced a moment of absolute, pure terror.

“Lindsay?” I said, knowing full well it was even before my lips could move.

My mind was racing through possibilities but there really was no way to disguise what I was doing. Caught with my hand down my panties? That was doable. Caught with my other hand on her pussy? Completely fucked.

“I’m sorry,” I said, repeating what I had whispered to her the last time. “I’m sorry. I’m just….”

I couldn’t even think of anything else to say, what else was there? I pulled my arms back to my body, hugging myself as if it could bring some comfort. I was shaking all over and I felt very close to tears. Even though I had gone through the risks in my head previously I was completely unprepared for the reality of having to face them.

I couldn’t decide what to do, whether to run and just get as far away as I could or maybe just curl up in a ball and close my eyes. It didn’t really matter though since I was frozen in place and couldn’t seem to gain any kind of motor control.

“It’s okay, Andrea,” Lindsay said.

She had pulled her pajama bottoms back into place and sat up, allowing me to see her face more clearly. It was still unreadable to me in my state but I was pretty sure I already knew what she would be thinking. She reached out to me and I flinched away.

“No, it’s not,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s not going t-to be… it just isn’t.”

Even before I finished Lindsay’s hands were on me, pulling me toward her until her arms could wrap around me. It was such a bizarre thing for her to hold me that way given how she should be acting. Whatever that might mean I didn’t really think about it. Mostly I just cried.

The tears had been waiting and once they started I couldn’t stop them. I still didn’t know how to face my sister, yet I felt safe in her arms. It was exactly the way I’d held her when she was sad or scared, and now our positions were reversed. Maybe it was those memories that made some part of me think she could somehow protect me from… her.

My sense of time was not functioning particularly well but we sat there long enough for me to make a sizable damp spot on the front of Lindsay’s shirt. Even when I stopped crying I just stayed where I was, afraid to break the moment.

“You feel better?” Lindsay asked eventually.

“A little,” I admitted. “How come you aren’t mad?” Maybe I shouldn’t have been so blunt, but she was confusing the hell out of me.

“Do you want me to be?”

“I just mean… you know what I was doing, right?”

I couldn’t imagine that she didn’t. She was my baby sister and all, but she couldn’t possibly be that naive.

“I think so,” she said. “Andrea, if it had been me instead of you, would you be mad at me?”

“No,” I replied without even thinking. “But that’s–”

“Different? How exactly? I wish you would have talked to me, but I’m not going to be mad at you.”

“I couldn’t talk to you,” I said quietly. “Couldn’t tell anyone.”

“I know, I probably wouldn’t have either. I just wish is all.”

Lindsay was stroking my hair gently, soothingly, and I was slowly calming down. I was still confused about her reaction, but she wasn’t angry or anything and that had to be a good sign. For the first time in a long while I felt real hope that our relationship might actually be okay, that it wouldn’t be either based on secrets or nonexistent.

She had a point too about our positions being reversed. Even if I didn’t feel the way I did about her I knew that I wouldn’t have been upset, not really. I loved her and it would take something much, much worse to change that. It was certainly possible that she felt the same.

“You’re taking this all really well,” I said, pointing out the obvious. “Better than I am.”

“Not as well as you think,” she said. “I mean, I’m okay. I just… You were always there when I needed you, you know? Always. This is the first time you needed me, I could see it.”

I reluctantly pulled myself away from the comfort of her embrace and finally looked at her for real. She was still doing her best to hide it but now that I could focus I noticed the confusion and the worry. She was being strong for me, pretending that she could handle it. Just like I had done when she had boy problems or thought she was going to fail a class; I hadn’t really known what to do, only that she needed to believe it would be okay. Had she picked it up from me or was it instinctive?

“I’m sorry,” I said, for different reasons this time.

I slipped back into her arms, hugging her back this time and letting our bodies press together. Without letting go, we laid down on the bed, sharing Lindsay’s pillow and simply holding each other for a while.

“So how long have you…” she started, maybe just to break the silence.

“I don’t know, really. At some point, I just felt something different. Probably while watching you sleep at some point… you look even more beautiful when you’re sleeping.”

Lindsay smiled but also looked a little embarrassed at the compliment. She looked so adorable.

“So what happens now?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I never expected anything like this, never prepared for it. It’s up to you, I guess. If you want me to give you more space or anything, I understand.”

“Does that mean you’re not going to want to touch me anymore?”

I’d purposefully skirted around that issue, and hadn’t expected her to bring it up. My little sister was surprising me.

“I want to, Lin,” I said honestly. “But I know it has to be weird for you. I tried my best not to, and I did pretty well for a while. Maybe it’ll be easier now.”

“Maybe,” she agreed, sounding thoughtful. “What if… what if I let you?”

“Really!?” I tried not to sound too excited at the idea but didn’t really succeed. “I mean, I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want.”

“You wouldn’t be forcing me, it’s my choice. I think I want to at least try it. For you.”

She looked deeply into my eyes as she said the last words and I could see the love behind them. She would do this for me just as I would help her when she needed it. A range of emotions flooded through me and I wanted so badly to kiss her. I held myself back and instead touched her cheek softly, feeling reassured when she didn’t try to jerk away.

“Tell me to stop anytime if you don’t feel comfortable,” I told her.

She shook her head slightly as if to tell me that she wouldn’t need to. Hopefully, she was right.

I moved in slowly, giving her plenty of time to react if she chose. When our faces were only a couple inches apart she actually leaned toward me a little, much to my delight. Then our lips met, just barely brushing together at first.

Lindsay was nervous, as I had known she would be, but once she got over the initial shock she seemed to settle in a little bit. She even started to respond a little to the movement of my lips. It wasn’t her first time kissing someone, and maybe it was partly just an automatic response, but I wanted to believe that maybe she was enjoying it.

Finally, I pulled away from her, not wanting to overwhelm her too soon. We studied each other’s faces as we tried to get our breathing under control, seeking some clue to what the other was thinking. She didn’t say anything immediately but at least she didn’t look freaked out by the experience.

Without waiting long enough for her to speak I leaned in to kiss Lindsay again, this time a bit more aggressively. When I took her bottom lip gently between my teeth I could swear I heard a small noise of pleasure from deep in her throat.

“That actually felt kinda nice,” she said as we took another break.

“Good, I don’t want you to hate this.”

“I wouldn’t hate it, I just wasn’t sure that I’d like it.”

“Well…” I paused for a second, trying to figure out how best to make my offer. “If you want to try more stuff to see if you like it, I’d pretty much give you full access.”

“What do you mean?”

I wasn’t sure how to explain it any better; my ability to form complex sentences was not at peak performance. Instead I took her wrist and guided her hand to cup my breast over the thin material of my bra.

“You said you’d let me try things with you, I’m saying pretty much the same to you I guess,” I said. “Only I’m a lot more sure that I’ll like it.”

Lindsay looked unsure but her hand didn’t move when I let go of her arm. It could be that she had a lesbian streak in her just as I did, but maybe I was hoping for too much.

Her fingers shifted a little after a moment, only barely noticeablee, but I also sensed her relaxing as she adjusted to the idea of touching my breast. I wondered if she could feel my nipple through my bra, I guessed she could, given how well I could feel her palm.

Not wanting to scare her off but also wanting to offer her more, I reached behind my back and unhooked my bra. It stayed mostly in place, mostly because Lindsay was effectively holding it there, but it would come off easily if she wanted it to. She really didn’t seem to know what she wanted however, and looked at me helplessly.

“I don’t know what to do,” she said.

“Whatever you want baby, do what you feel like doing. Nothing bad’s going to happen.”

“I know, it’s just so new.”

Despite my reassurance she remained paralyzed in indecision, her hand on my chest the only point of contact between us. As little activity as there was, I was drawn to every breath she took and every small movement of her fingers. I wanted more from her, I wanted to feel her exploring my body. I wanted her to make that choice. Until she did I couldn’t rush her, not without risking everything.

Finally, agonizingly slowly, her fingertips closed around the very top of my bra. I held perfectly still as she pulled it away and let it fall onto the mattress, leaving me topless in front of her.

“They’re beautiful,” she breathed.

“You think so?”

I was happy she’d said that, for a couple of reasons. One, if she liked seeing me naked it was a good sign of things to come. Two, despite my apparent confidence, there was always an irrational fear that when I let someone see my body, they’d be disappointed. No one had been yet, but that didn’t mean I could make that particular worry go away.

“Yeah, they’re so round and nice. Bigger than mine, too.”

Lindsay ducked her head a little as she said that and placed one of her hands on each of my breasts. I almost let it go since she was finally touching me the way I wanted her to, getting comfortable with our new closeness. I knew she was only trying to distract me though and hoping I wouldn’t notice her own insecurity.

“Lin, you don’t have to worry about your body, you know,” I said. “Not with me. I’m your sister and the last person who should be looking at you that way, but I did anyway. A lot. I haven’t seen you naked yet, not fully, but you really don’t have to worry.”

She didn’t say anything for a minute and wouldn’t meet my eyes, but she didn’t stop playing with my breasts either. Maybe it helped that her mind was on something else and she wasn’t thinking about what she was doing.

Whatever the case, her inexpert caresses felt amazing and I didn’t want her to stop. Her lack of experience might even have made it feel better in some ways, giving our intimacy a kind of innocence that wouldn’t exist if she’d been actively trying to make me feel good. I tried to commit every detail to memory since it would most likely be very difficult to replicate in the future.

“Do you want to?” she asked. “I mean, do you want to see me… naked?”

“Of course I do, I’d love to. When you’re ready, though.”

She was spending a lot of time appearing to be lost in thought. It made sense given the sheer amount of things she had to process, but I wished she would give me more of an idea exactly what she was thinking about.

I gasped as she pinched my nipple and she looked up at me startled, afraid she’d hurt me. I only smiled and guided her hands back where she’d pulled away. Usually I wasn’t really into having my nipples handled roughly, but for the sake of my sister’s learning I didn’t mind. She didn’t even pinch them again, sticking mostly with rubbing them and looking a couple times like she might actually lick one. She never got quite that bold, though.

After a while she sat up and stretched her arm out where she’d been laying on it. Her eyes stayed on my body as she did so, traveling from my neck down to my legs. I rolled onto my back and spread my legs a little to give her the best view I could and basked in the appreciative expression on her face. I didn’t enjoy having her look at me as much as I did looking at her or anything, but it was still nice.

“Andrea?” she said.

“Yes?”

“I think I’m okay with… letting you see me and all…”

“What is it?” I prompted, trying to drag out whatever she was going to say before trailing off.

“Could I maybe see you first? I mean, you know.”

All I had on was my panties, and with her eyes constantly glancing over to that small area between my legs I felt pretty sure that I did know what she meant.

“Of course you can. Anything you want, Lin.”

Lindsay waited a moment as if expecting me to take my panties off for her. When I didn’t move at all I think she clued in and shifted to kneel next to my hip. She reached down with both hands to my waist and very gingerly took hold of my panties on either side. Visibly holding her breath she slowly pulled them down my legs.

I raised my butt off the mattress a little at first, then lifted my legs in order to make the task as easy as possible for my sister. She almost stopped when my pussy was revealed but continued all the way down and over my feet. She seemed torn for a second or two about what to do with my panties and settled for simply dropping them at the foot of the bed.

Lindsay crawled between my legs, her eyes wide and her features set in a look of wonder. She touched my inner thigh gently and I opened my legs wider for her. Her fingertips trailed across my skin toward my pussy but didn’t quite make it there.

“It’s beautiful,” she said. “It’s so smooth. It looks like mine.”

“We’re sisters, no reason they wouldn’t look the same.”

“I know, I guess I just didn’t know that you….”

“Kept mine shaved, too?” I finished for her.

“Yeah,” she said.

“I like how it looks, and how it feels. Makes me feel sexier when I’m masturbating.”

A look of… something crossed her face as the mention of masturbation.

“You masturbate, don’t you?” I asked, just to be sure.

“Yes! I mean, yeah, I do,” she said, seemingly embarrassed at how defensive she sounded. “But we never, you know, talked about it. Made me think about how much stuff we’re doing now, stuff we never did before.”

“We can stop if you want. Call it a night, and see how you feel tomorrow.”

“No, that’s okay. It’s only when I think about it I start getting overwhelmed. When I’m just going along, when I’m not thinking about it, what we’re doing feels good.”

“You’re worried about what it all means. You don’t know how it’s going to change things,” I said, not bothering to form it as a question. I knew what she meant about being overwhelmed, I’d been there.

“Something like that.” She nodded and gave me a weak smile. “And I know I could make some of the problems go away just by pretending this never happened, but I don’t want to. This feels different from anything I’ve ever done Andrea. This feels right.”

“Are you sure it’s not just ’cause you’ve never been with a girl before?”

What the hell did I say that for? Why would I try to discourage her line of thinking when it was going so well? I knew the answer even before I could finish formulating the questions. It was because, regardless of what I’d done or what would happen, I was still her big sister. I wanted her to be happy even if that meant a sacrifice on my part. This whole situation was my fault to start with.

“Maybe a little, I don’t know,” Lindsay said. “But I don’t think it’s that simple. I can’t explain it, not really, except that I want us to be closer than we were, like we are now. I just don’t know exactly what that’s going to be,” she finished apologetically.

“Whatever it is, we can do it together, it’s not something you have to deal with on your own.”

“I know, that’s part of why you’re different. That and you’re soft and warm and you’re not focused completely on getting off as soon you start getting undressed.”

“You’re only half right on that last one,” I said.

“No, I mean you’re giving me time to adjust and everything. I know you’re probably worked up and everything right now, but you’ve still been thinking about me.”

“Speaking of being worked up, no pressure or anything but if you don’t touch me again soon I’m probably going to have to do it myself.”

“You look like you need it,” Lindsay agreed. She looked purposefully at my pussy even though I couldn’t see it without sitting up. “You’re very, uh, wet.”

“I’m not surprised.”

Lindsay hesitantly reached down and placed her hand just above my pussy. It became clear pretty quickly that she really didn’t know what to do, mostly she just traced her fingers around my pussy lips. Occasionally she would get close enough to get some of my juices on her fingers and I could feel them being spread across my skin.

Eventually she did look up at me pleadingly, having realized what I already knew. It was one thing to get yourself off, but that didn’t necessarily translate to knowing what to do with someone else.

“See if you can get a couple fingers in me,” I whispered.

I wouldn’t normally start with that except that I really needed as much stimulation as I could get. I really hoped I’d be able to guide her well enough because if she couldn’t make me come relatively soon I was just going to get hornier until I was an absolute wreck.

My sister was still nervous but she followed my request and got her first two fingers in my pussy with very little difficulty. I was wet enough that it didn’t take much in the way of skill. She giggled in surprise at how easily they went in while I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling. I wasn’t exactly filled up but it would do.

Without having to be told, Lindsay started moving her hand back and forth, thrusting her fingers inside me. She was slow at first as she adjusted to the idea of what she was doing, but actually built up to a decent speed. It wasn’t quite as fast as I needed, though.

“Harder,” I urged. “Don’t worry about hurting me.”

“Okay.”

I moaned softly as she started finger-fucking me properly, driving her fingers in as far as they would go before pulling them back. Not that it was a complicated task, but my sister was actually doing quite well once she got past her hesitations. It made me wonder what it would be like once she got completely comfortable with me.

“Do you want me to rub your clit too?” Lindsay asked. “I usually like to, but I don’t know if you…”

“Oh god, yes. Please baby.”

That was one advantage to girls, they didn’t have to be taught everything like guys sometimes did. Even when they were new to it.

With the new double assault on my pussy and clit I finally had that feeling I’d been waiting for. My orgasm was building and, provided Lindsay kept up her current pace, would hit me soon.

“Don’t stop,” I begged. “Please don’t stop.”

She looked amazed at the effect she was having on me, probably not used to having anyone wriggling around in ecstasy at the mere touch of her fingers.

I was having a hard time keeping still, except that I knew thrashing around might dislodge her and I didn’t want that. My hips seemed to have a mind of their own and I gripped the sheets tightly to try and get my movements under control.

Then all thoughts of self-control vanished in an instant as I came. It was so intense, so massive, like nothing I’d ever felt before. All I felt was pleasure through my entire body, only barely aware of Lindsay’s continued stimulation.

I did eventually come down from my high, my eyes finally able to focus on things once more. The first thing I saw was my sister leaning over me looking concerned.

“Was I too loud?” I asked, noticing as I did that my throat was drier than I expected.  I had the vague impression that I’d screamed at some point.

“Only a little, I don’t think you were loud enough to wake anyone.”

“Good. You think you could get me some water?”

“Okay. Um, are you all right though? You weren’t responding for a couple seconds there and I didn’t know what to think.”

I smiled in an attempt to show that I was fine, but I’m not sure it convinced her. “There’s nothing wrong, babe. I was just feeling really, really good. You were amazing.”

There was a visible surge of pride on her face at the compliment and she seemed reassured enough to leave the room. She was only gone a minute or two before returning with a glass of water for me.

“Thanks,” I said, sitting up to take the glass from her.

“You’re welcome.”

I drank a third of the water in a couple large swallows, then sipped at it as my thirst diminished.

“So you’re probably tired now,” Lindsay said. “Probably ready to go to sleep.”

She was fidgeting with her hands and I got the definite impression that she was hoping I’d say I wasn’t.

“Kinda, I am a little drained. Lindsay…” I paused for a second and tried to figure out how to say what I wanted. After a moment I gave up and just went for it. “I know you’re maybe not ready for this, but do you want me to take care of you now? Because I don’t think I could ever be tired enough to say no to that.”

She nodded without quite meeting my eyes. “I’m so worked up, Andrea. I never… I don’t remember feeling like this before.”

Setting the mostly empty water glass on the nightstand beside the bed, I shifted closer to my sister. I pulled her to me and gently kissed her until I felt some of the stiffness leave her.

“You don’t have to worry about that, anything like that,” I said. “I know what you’re experiencing better than anyone.”

“I know, I want you to. I just got scared at how badly I wanted it.”

“Why? Were you scared this whole time?”

“No. It’s only when I realized how much you’re affecting me, how much I want that to continue. Andrea, what if it doesn’t? What if everything changes?”

I guess I should have expected Lindsay to freak out at some point, she had enough to deal with. I almost freaked out too,not immediately knowing what to do but wanting so badly to help. She looked like she might cry, and I didn’t know if I could handle seeing her that way.

“Listen, things are going to change, things always change. But I promise that the important things aren’t. I’m not ever going to stop loving you as my sister, and as more if you let me. If anyone tries to get between us, they’ll have to drag me away kicking and screaming.”

Lindsay managed a small half-smile for me, but didn’t seem entirely convinced.

“What about when you get tired of me?” she asked, trying to make it sound like a joke.

“Lin, I’ve known you for eighteen years now. You’re my little sister, not someone I just met. I thought two semesters away would help and they didn’t, I only wanted you more. I won’t ever stop loving you, baby, not for anything.”

I barely had a chance to finish before she tackled me, locking her arms around me tightly. “I love you, too,” she whispered in my ear.

We hugged for long enough for me to remember I was naked, and for sexual feelings to gradually replace the emotional ones I’d started out with. I wanted to be able to make her feel as good as she did for me and hopefully to leave any lingering problems until later.

Moving slowly I began to lift the bottom of Lindsay’s shirt. When I was about halfway up her body she raised her arms above her shoulders, giving me silent permission. I had a little difficulty getting the neck past her head and had to shift my grip, but soon had her topless in front of me.

I kissed her passionately, letting our naked breasts press together as we embraced. As had been the case pretty much the whole time she let me take the lead, only now I could actually use it to full effect. Not yet breaking our kiss I guided her backward until she was lying down underneath me.

As soon I got her settled I went for her bottoms. She again responded to my non-verbal requests and helped me to remove her pajama pants, leaving her completely naked.

This was where I had to be somewhat careful, since being naked in front of someone for the first time is usually a bit scary. Particularly when you’re not quite certain how they’ll react but desperately want them to like what they see.

“So beautiful,” I breathed, not exaggerating even slightly.

Lindsay squirmed in a mixture of pleasure and embarrassment but didn’t say anything. She clutched her hands nervously in front of her and I had to pull them apart in order to get access to her breasts. I gently kissed each one before sucking one of her nipples between my lips.

“Are you sure they’re not too small?” she asked.

“Baby, how many times do I have to tell you that you’re absolutely perfect?”

“At least twice a day.”

I looked up at her, surprise evident on my face. “Was that an actual joke I heard?”

“Maybe.” She shrugged but the little grin on her face gave her away.

“Okay, I can handle that.” I crawled up farther along her body and kissed her lovingly. “You’re perfect, you’re my beautiful little sister and I love every single part of you. How’s that?”

I didn’t give her a chance to answer and instead kissed her again, completely cutting off anything she might have tried to say. She responded eagerly and met my tongue midway between our mouths with her own. I stroked one of her breasts with my hand as our tongues wrestled playfully.

One of my legs was between hers and she started humping against it, craving her own release but not wanting to say so. I knew what she needed though and I’d take care of it.

“I guess you’re also my horny little sister, aren’t you?” I said.

“Please, Andrea,” she begged non-specifically.

“Don’t worry baby, I got it.”

I had to position myself so that my head was more or less at the level of her hips. Her pussy was, like mine had been, already more than ready for me. She even seemed to be dripping onto the bed slightly before I so much as touched her most intimate place.

I started by running my fingers up and down her pussy lips, trailing my middle finger directly along her wet slit. Lindsay moaned and rocked her hips toward me impatiently as she waited for me to get on with it. Smiling to myself I pushed a single finger into her accepting entrance. It was tight, but not to the point of slowing me down very much.

“Is that okay, Lin?” I asked.

“Uh-huh,” she replied simply.

She was squeezing one of her breasts rhythmically, but I’m not certain she was fully aware of it. Her attention seemed to be mainly on me and what I was doing.

Instead of sliding another finger in and more or less repeating what she’d done to me, I turned my focus to her clit. I had a better idea what I was doing and was pretty sure finesse was the way to go at this point. She was turned on enough that I didn’t have to worry about building her up, I just needed to release all that sexual energy inside her.

I leaned in close and let my tongue dart out to flick against her sensitive clit. I made sure to pay attention to her reactions every time I licked her as I worked out what she responded best to. Some other time I could spend hours teasing her if I wanted, right now I was only interested in making her come fast and hard.

A pattern of long, forceful licks interspersed with sucking briefly on her clit was what I settled on. My sister’s moans had intensified and I knew the stimulation on her clit and pussy would soon have her coming on my finger. I didn’t even stop long enough to remind her not to be too loud, not wanting to let up the pressure for a second.

My efforts were soon rewarded as I brought Lindsay to orgasm. Her pussy did its best to crush my finger and her moans became dangerously loud before she clamped her pillow down over her face. I kept my tongue pressed against her clit until she calmed down and I sensed her body relaxing.

She lay on her back panting as I climbed up next to her and pulled the covers up over the both of us. I only barely got us settled in before she rolled over and curled up in my arms, burying her head against my shoulder.

“Andrea?”

“Yeah, baby,” I whispered.

“I love you.”

“I know, I love you too.”

That was effectively the end of our short conversation. I didn’t know how long it was before Lindsay’s breathing changed to signal she was asleep, but I continued to lie awake, holding her long after. The night had turned out so much better than I could ever have hoped and I didn’t really want it to end, even though I was exhausted. The only reason I was willing to surrender to sleep at all was that I wanted to be able to wake up with my sister, to have as much of the day together as possible.

There would be more problems, I had no illusions otherwise. I didn’t worry about them, though, couldn’t bring myself to care. I had my sister now, in every way, and as long as we were together nothing else mattered.

The End

 

9 Comments on Guilty Love

  1. mollymom says:

    really lovely in all ways but one … and since it’s a literotica import, i get why that’s the case. maybe edit their ages down a little? just a thought …

    • JetBoy says:

      Juicy Secrets does feature a lot of stories involving underage girls, but that’s only part of what we do in our quest to showcase edgy lesbian erotica.

      Personally, I don’t think this one would work as well with younger characters. I certainly felt no need to adjust their ages, anyhow. Generally, I’d only do that if the girl seemed far too mature or immature for her age to make sense in the context of the plot.

      • Tim says:

        Good story, and I agree exactly Jetboy.
        The ages are perfect as is the love and intimacy between sisters.
        Thanks for posting it.

  2. Bryan says:

    Not to bad I liked it

  3. Lakeisha says:

    Very Hot!

  4. Mark says:

    Great story, slowly building to the climax.

  5. Bethor says:

    Great story!

  6. Neil says:

    It was very interesting to see this one on here because I have just recently found Xarth on Literotica and I liked his writing. I was going back to trawl through his stories when I got an update from you, came and looked and what did I find but Xarth!
    There is a coincidence…
    Well paced, nice build up and not forced in anyway so made for an entertaining read, thanks for sharing it.

  7. lickit100 says:

    lovely so lovely and loving

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