Juicy Secrets Forbidden Tales of Lesbian Love

By Muffi

{ This story was originally posted at Lesbian Lolita in February 2010 }

***

A note from JetBoy: This is a two-part story, and the opening chapter you’re about to start reading was originally posted at Juicy Secrets a year ago. Unfortunately, I somehow neglected to post the second half, damn it all. Today, my blunder has been made right. And since those of you who read this opening chapter last year probably don’t recall its precise details, we have chosen to link to it first. So be sure to jump ahead to Part Two when you get to the bottom. Enjoy.

***

I had been sitting with Kirsten for about six months when it happened. I won’t call it “babysitting,” because she’s anything but a baby, and it would really upset her if I called her that. Kirsten was nine the first time her mother asked me if I could watch her on a regular basis after school until she got home from work. She paid pretty well, but that wouldn’t have mattered. Kirsten and her mom live next door to us, and I’ve always liked her, ever since they moved in. She’s a really cool kid.

I always thought that the reason Kirsten liked to hang around with me so much was because she just looked up to me. I’m nearly seven years older, so I guess she saw me as almost a grown up, but also still young enough to be cool. It wasn’t until I’d been sitting with her for about six months that I figured out that she had a really, really intense crush on me.

At first, I was kind of freaked out by that. I mean, I’m into girls, but I never even thought about little girls like Kirsten that way. It was pretty weird to think that Kirsten had a crush on me. Once I figured it out though, I couldn’t get rid of the thought. I mean, I know it’s wrong, but still I kept thinking about her having a crush on me, and what it would be like to teach her some things.

I think Kirsten really liked that I always did stuff that I could include her in, and that I didn’t treat her like a little kid, even though she was one. She still is, really, but I don’t tell her that. Even though she’s ten now, and I’m almost seventeen, I still think of her as a little kid. Not like most little kids though. It’s kind of hard to explain. I mean, I know she’s a kid and all, but when we’re together, I can’t help but think of her as a woman.

I can’t help the fact that I’m in love with her, either. I know that sounds pretty stupid, since she’s so young, but it’s the truth.

Anyway, like I said, I’d been sitting with her for about six months when I finally figured out that Kirsten had a thing for me. I’m not stupid or anything, it’s just that I wasn’t looking for it, you know? It’s not like she was somebody my own age or anything. You can always tell when somebody your own age has a crush on you. It’s just that she’s so young, I didn’t figure it out for a while.

Anyway, on the day that everything finally happened, I’d rushed over to Kirsten’s house and run inside. It was going to rain, and from what I could tell, it was going to be a real big storm. I got inside and found Kirsten there waiting for me. She’d already changed out of her school clothes, and she had on a pair of old cut off denim shorts and a pretty tight t-shirt.

When I came in the door, she came running up and gave me a big hug. While she was holding me, I felt her move one hand up so it was pressed between my shoulder blades. Her other hand dropped down, so her arm was wrapped around my hips and her hand was resting on my butt.

I don’t know why that caught my attention that day. She’s hugged me like that before. But for some reason, that day I was especially aware of that little hand on my bottom, and the way she nuzzled her head in between my breasts.

“Hiya, Jess,” she said. She was leaning back now, grinning up at me.

“Hey, Kirsten,” I replied. “How are ya?”

“Pretty good,” she replied. “No homework tonight! Yay!”

“Lucky you,” I said, with a grimace. “I’ve got a ton of it.”

“That sucks!” she said. “Do you have to get it done right away?”

I shook my head. “Nah, it’s okay. I can do it later on tonight.”

“Cool!” Kirsten squealed. “You wanna watch a movie or somethin’? We can’t go anywhere, ‘cos it’s gonna pour.”

“Sure,” I said. “We can do whatever you want.”

“You wanna pick one, or you want me to?” she asked.

“Uhm, you can pick one out,” I said.

“Okay,” she said. “Let’s get some popcorn and Coke first, though.”

She broke away from me, and I started the popcorn in the microwave. While I waited, I watched Kirsten as she got ur drinks ready.

Kirsten’s about four-feet, eight inches tall, and I figure she probably weighs about seventy pounds. She’s kind of on the slim side, but not really skinny. Her hair is really curly and long, almost to the middle of her back. She usually wears it in two ponytails up on the sides of her head. It’s light brown, like the color of caramel. She’s got brown eyes, and a pretty mouth with what I guess they call a “pouty” bottom lip. Her nose is small, and it turns up at the end. She’s really cute.

While she was getting glasses down from the cupboard, I suddenly caught myself staring at her butt. That kind of surprised me. But what really surprised me was how beautiful I thought it was. Not just cute, but beautiful. Then when she turned around, I noticed how I could see her nipples under her t-shirt. They were just starting to get that puffy look that girls get when their boobs are getting ready to sprout. I thought that was just the loveliest thing I’d ever seen. This was getting really weird!

Kirsten must have noticed me noticing her chest, because she smiled at me and kind of pushed it out a little.

“My boobs are starting to grow!” she said proudly. Then she asked, “Jess, do you think mine will ever get as nice as yours are?”

“Of course!” I said. “They’re already looking pretty good.”

“You really think so?”

“Yup,” I nodded. She grinned proudly.

“Guess what else?” she said in a dramatic stage whisper.

“What?”

“I’m getting hair down there, too.” She pointed at her crotch. “I don’t have much yet, but it’s starting to grow.”

“That’s great,” I murmured. “You’re really growing up, huh kiddo?”

Kirsten nodded, blushing and smiling shyly.

The popcorn was done, and Kirsten had the sodas poured, so we took everything and went into the living room to watch a movie.

I was really, really surprised at her choice in movies. She pulled out a DVD and stuck it in, and I was shocked when I saw that it was the movie Boys Don’t Cry. If you don’t know the movie, it’s based on a true story about a transgendered girl who tries to live her life as a boy. In the end she winds up being murdered because she’s different.

I was kind of uneasy about letting Kirsten watch it, but she told me that she’d already seen it with her mom, so I figured it must be okay. It just surprised me because it’s such a grown up movie for a little girl to want to watch, especially since she’d already seen it once.

When the movie was done, Kirsten sat next to me, being really quiet. We switched over to the television, and watched some stupid talk show in silence for a couple of minutes. Then she snuggled in next to me, arranging herself so that my arm was around her, and she was resting against my side.

“Jess,” she said, “is it wrong for girls to like other girls? Like in the movie, I mean?”

“I don’t think it is, no,” I said. “But a lot of people do think that way.”

“But why?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I guess because it’s something they don’t understand.”

She was quiet for a few minutes again. Then she snuggled down even closer to me.

“So you don’t think it’s wrong then? If a girl likes girls, I mean?”

“Of course not,” I answered.

“Would you get freaked out if a girl liked you that way?” she asked.

“Nah,” I said. I was trying to avoid the fact that I’m into girls, actually. That was my big secret, one only a couple of other girls knew. At the same time, I was really aware of the fact that Kirsten’s warm little body was pressed up against mine, her head resting on my left breast.

All of a sudden, Kirsten seemed to be really nervous. She pulled away from me, then turned to face me on the couch.

“Hey,” she said, “you wanna see how my hair is starting to grow down there?”

Talk about being surprised! Part of me was thinking, No way! Don’t even go there, Jess! But another part of me really wanted to see. I was annoyed at myself for thinking that way, because she was just a little girl, after all. But I couldn’t stop thinking how cute she was getting, and… well, damn it, I just wanted to see her naked.

“Uhmm… well, I guess.. if you wanna show me, sure,” I said quietly.

Kirsten got serious then. “You promise you won’t laugh at me?”

“Of course not!” I replied. “Why would I laugh?”

“Cos I don’t really have much there yet,” she said. “It’s just that no one’s seen it, and it’s so cool that I’m finally starting to grow hair on my p-pussy!” She giggled, thrilled to be using a grownup word.

“I promise, Kirsten,” I said, “I won’t laugh at you.”

“Okay,” she said. She stood up from the couch then, and turned so she was standing in front of me. I was pretty surprised to find that my heart was beating like crazy, pounding hard and fast.

I watched Kirsten as she unbuttoned her shorts, then pulled the zipper down. She hesitated for a second, blushing, then she shoved her shorts down really fast, and stood looking at me expectantly.

I almost forgot to breathe.

Her little pussy was gorgeous. She’s one of those girls who has a really puffy, plump little mons that seemed to swell just a bit. She was right — she didn’t have much hair yet, but it was definitely there. Just a few dark, very soft looking strands of silken down that perfectly matched the caramel-colored hair on her head. My eyes slowly traveled up her body until I was gazing into her eyes.

Kirsten didn’t say a word. She just stood there, displaying herself to me… and all I could do was stare like an idiot. Finally, I was able to find my voice again.

“I think it’s beautiful,” I told her.

“You’re not just saying that?” she asked. “You really think so?”

I cleared my throat. “Yeah, sweetie,” I said. “I really do think so.”

She blushed. “I’m glad you think that,” she murmured.

Slowly, almost reluctantly, Kirsten reached down and tugged her shorts back up. I found myself wanting to ask her to leave them down, to let me look some more. I didn’t, though. I kept my mouth shut. I mean, she was just a kid. I couldn’t even think of going where my head wanted to take me.

When she had her shorts back together, Kirsten came back to the couch and sat down next to me again. She leaned against me, her head resting on my shoulder. Neither of us said anything for a few minutes. We just sat there, lost in our own thoughts, staring at the television without paying attention. Then I felt her sigh.

“Jess?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think I’m gonna be pretty someday?”

I smiled. I couldn’t resist teasing her a little bit. “Nope,” I said.

I felt her head jerk up, and saw her from the corner of my eye, staring up at me in shock. “No?” she said.

I shook my head. “Nope.”

She didn’t know what to say. I let her stew in it for a minute, then I couldn’t help grinning. “No, Kirsten, I don’t think you’re gonna be pretty someday,” I said quietly. “I think you’re beautiful right now.”

I heard her breath catch in her throat for a second. “You mean it, Jess?” she said. “You really, truly think that about me?”

“Yeah, sweetie,” I said. I shifted myself so that I could put my arm around her shoulders, letting her snuggle against my side again. “I really think you’re beautiful.”

Kirsten moved so that her head was resting against my breast; one hand snaked across my belly as she pressed herself in even tighter to me.

“Jess,” she said softly, “c-can I tell you something?”

“Of course,” I said.

“If I tell you,” she said, “you hafta promise you won’t say anything to anybody else. ‘Specially my mom.”

“I promise I won’t tell anyone,” I said.

“Cross your heart?”

I reached up and drew a cross over my heart with one finger. “Hope to die,” I said.

“And you hafta promise you won’t make fun of me, either.”

“I promise I won’t make fun of you.”

She was quiet for a minute, then she heaved a huge sigh. “I — I like girls,” she said.

I hesitated. I didn’t want to make the mistake of taking what she was saying the wrong way. “Well, of you course you do, silly,” I said. “You’re a girl. That just makes sense.”

“No,” she said, “I mean… Well… you know how all the girls go crazy ’bout the Jonas Brothers? How they all think they’re so sexy and stuff? Well, I kinda feel like that ’bout Hilary Duff and Pink. I don’t think boys are sexy. I think girls are.”

All of a sudden, my heart was pounding in my chest again. Careful, Jess, I thought. Just be very careful here.

“Well,” I said, “so what? I mean, it’s okay to like girls like that. You’re still you. It just means you’re a little different from some of your friends. But not that different. Lots of girls like other girls that way.”

“Really?” she said. “So it’s not like, really weird or anything?”

“No, sweetie,” I said. “It’s not weird. Even if some people say it is, it’s not.”

“Then how come all the kids in school say it’s really sick and stuff?”

“Because they don’t understand it,” I said. “They’re scared.”

“I hate that I can’t tell any of my friends about it,” she said, pouting. “They all talk about the sexy guys, and how some of the boys in school are so hot and stuff, and I hafta kinda play along with it and pretend I think that way, too.”

God, was I familiar with that feeling! I thought about myself, and how I’d had to hide the truth from my friends for so long, until I finally was able to confide in a couple of them. I was counting the days until I started college, which was when I planned to come out… and if any of my friends weren’t able to accept me for who I am, that’s their loss. But Kirsten was just a kid. It’d be harder for her, I knew.

“Wanna know a secret?” I asked her.

I felt her nod her head against my boob.

“I like girls that way, too.” I said.

I felt her head move, and I looked down at her. She was staring up at me. “You do?”

I nodded. “Yeah, I do,” I said. “Think about it. Have you ever seen me with a boyfriend?”

She thought for a minute. “No,” she finally said.

“Well, that’s ‘cos I don’t like boys that way. I like girls.” I shrugged. “You can’t help being who you are, Kirsten. Liking girls is just a part of you.”

She was silent again for a minute. “Thanks, Jess,” she said, finally.

“For what?” I asked.

“For tellin’ me. And for not thinkin’ I’m weird or stupid.”

“You’re not weird, and you’re not stupid,” I said. “You’re just you.”

Again, she fell silent for a while. She was still curled into me, her head on my breast, her arm draped over my belly. I had one arm around her, enjoying the warmth of her little body against mine. I reached up and stroked her hair with my fingers.

“Jess… what’s it like?” she asked.

“What’s what like, Sweetie?”

“What’s it like to kiss another girl?”

“It’s amazing,” I smiled. “You’ll love it, I promise.”

Again that long pause while she considered everything she was going through. I knew this had to be really hard for her.

“Can I tell you somethin’ else?” she finally said.

I just nodded.

“I think about kissing you,” she said shyly.

My heart skipped a beat. “You do?”

She nodded. “I think about that a lot.” She hesitated, then continued when I didn’t say anything. “I’ve liked you for a really long time. Ever since I met you. I think about kissing you whenever I… well…” Her voice trailed off.

“When you what, sweetie?”

“When I t-touch myself,” she said shyly. “You know… down there?”

My heart did another skip. I felt it in other places, too. In the pit of my stomach. Between my legs. Especially between my legs. I felt a warm dampness beginning to build in my panties.

She’s a little girl, Jess, I thought anxiously. Be careful here.

“I… I don’t know what to say,” I replied. “I had no idea you felt that way about me.”

“It’s okay,” she said with a sigh. “You don’t hafta like me back like that. I know I’m just a kid, an’ I don’t have any boobs or anything yet. I’d be kinda stupid to think you like me back the same way.”

“Kirsten, it’s not that,” I said. “It’s just…” I trailed off.

In about three seconds, years flashed through my mind. I remembered when I was Kirsten’s age, knowing I was different, not knowing what it meant. Being afraid of what I felt. Thinking I was weird or sick because of the things that I thought about when I masturbated. Wanting something, but not knowing exactly what it was. Most of all, how horribly alone and lonely I felt most of the time, because I thought I was so different from everyone else.

It’s just what, Jess? I thought. What is it, exactly? I didn’t have an answer.

Kirsten was looking up at me, waiting for me to finish that thought. I didn’t know what to say, so I didn’t say anything. Very slowly, I shifted position so that I sat facing her. I reached up with both hands and rested them against the sides of her face, staring into her eyes. Slowly, almost hesitantly, I leaned in closer to her. I saw her eyes widen when she figured out what I was going to do, just before I closed my own eyes at the moment that my lips touched hers.

I kissed her softly, gently. No tongue, no deep passion. Not yet. Just a very long, soft, gentle kiss, sucking lightly on her bottom lip.

I felt her stiffen for a moment. Then she relaxed. I felt her hand move and come to rest on my thigh as she sat, perfectly still, letting me linger in that kiss for as long as I wanted to. Truth is, I didn’t want to end it. I could have stayed there, happily, our lips pressed gently together, for the rest of the night. Finally, though, I had to break the sweetness. I pulled my mouth from hers, gently pulling her head into the side of my neck, my arms sliding down to hold her.

I felt her sigh deeply. “That was nice,” she whispered against my neck. Her warm breath made me shiver.

At that moment, we heard her mother’s car pulling into the driveway. Damn it! I thought.

I couldn’t believe what came from my mouth next. I pulled away from Kirsten quickly, her face cupped in my hands again. I stared into her eyes for a moment.

“Kirsten, would you like to stay with me tonight? At my house, I mean?”

Her eyes widened. “You mean it? Like, stay overnight? Really?”

I nodded. She smiled shyly.

“Yeah,” she whispered. “I’d like that a lot.”

“Good,” I whispered. “Just let me do the talking, okay?”

She nodded. “Okay.”

The front door opened, and Kirsten’s mom Lisa entered the house. We heard her footsteps as she came into the living room.

“Hi, girls,” she said. “How’s everything going?”

“Oh, hi, Lisa,” I said. “Everything’s fine. How was work?”

Lisa came around the couch, and practically collapsed into the recliner. “Long,” she said. “Reeeeally long. I’m exhausted!”

“Oh, that sucks,” I said. Then I put a sheepish look on my face. “Uhmm… I’m afraid I kinda screwed up tonight, Lisa,” I said. “Kirsten and I got all involved in watching a movie, and then we got to talking about stuff, and we never did get started on her homework. But, I have an idea, if it’s okay with you.”

“What’s that?” she asked.

“Well,” I said, “Kirsten has a lot of math homework. I thought maybe, if it’s okay with you, she could come over to my house for dinner, and then I can help her with her math. And then, if it’s okay, we could have a sleepover.”

Lisa smiled. “You don’t mind spending your whole evening with a nine-year-old?” she asked.

I grinned. “Nah, I like hangin’ out with Kirsten.”

Lisa shrugged. “Well, as long as you promise me that she’ll get all of her homework done, sure. And I can just grab a quick bite and go right to bed. I could use some extra sleep tonight.”

“Awesome!” I said. “Kirsten, you wanna go get some things together? Get your books, and something to sleep in, and some clothes for school tomorrow.”

Kirsten jumped up from the couch, grinning. “Cool!” she said. She spun around and ran off up the stairs.

“Don’t forget your toothbrush!” I shouted after her.

“Jess, thank you,” said Lisa. “It means a lot that you treat Kirsten like an equal. She adores you, y’know. Are you sure your parents won’t mind you bringing company home?”

“No, they won’t mind,” I replied. “And it’s no problem. Kirsten’s a really cool kid. I like spending time with her.”

“Just make sure she gets to sleep at some kind of a reasonable hour, okay?”

“I will.” I grinned at her. “Prob’ly like midnight. You know what a sleepover is like!”

Lisa snickered. “Yes, I do,” she said. “Midnight is more than satisfactory for a sleepover.”

“I promise, she’ll get plenty of sleep, and I’ll make sure she gets off to school on time tomorrow.”

“Thanks again, Jess,” she said. “I really can use the extra rest tonight.”

Kirsten came bouncing down the stairs, her school backpack on her shoulder, and a tote bag with her clothes and stuff in one hand. She came around the recliner and kissed her Mom on the cheek. “Bye, Mom,” she chirped. “I’ll see ya tomorrow night.”

“Good night, baby,” said Lisa. “Have fun… but get to sleep at a decent hour, okay?”

“I will,” giggled Kirsten.

“Night, Lisa,” I said, standing and following Kirsten to the door. “Get some rest. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Good night, girls.”

On to Part Two!